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I will say this--
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True cases are exceedingly rare.
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That's comforting. Sort of.
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Renfield's may be rare,
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But vampires are anything but.
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And there's a huge subculture in Los Angeles
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Of the red-drinking undead.
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Why is that not a surprise?
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Garcia, all these people drink blood?
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Au contraire. They mostly just dress
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Up like Prentiss did in high school
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And they make believe. It's all kinds of delicious.