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Time to visit our loved ones
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Some of you will travel as far as three miles!
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Don't forget to visit our winter wonderland in the quad,
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Where we're giving away catalogues of next semester's classes.
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Whoa, what's that sound?
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Is that the tippy-tapping of secular boots on the roof?
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Oh, well, it must be yet another sign
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that it tis the season,
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Because rumor has it that non-denominational Mr. Winter
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is on his way to the student lounge!
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I'm so sick of the dean jamming his p.C.-ness down my throat.
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Pierce, I'd like to commend you