They pissed in the porridge.

他们在粥里撒尿了
Ah, I have had my fill.

酒杯盈满
Oh, finally, someone who can hold their wine!

酒过数巡美人终至
I did not realize we were for company.

竟然有人相伴实属意外
He leaves presently.

他即刻就走
Oh please, after we have finished the jug.

何急一时待饮毕此壶琼浆
The last of my spoils to be shared with dearest of friends.

最后的战利品但求与挚友共享
Replace dearest with only, and sentiment becomes truth.

说"挚友"恐有不妥若说"唯一的朋友"情谊倒是可信
Hmm, subtle argument,

差之微妙
who was the better man as we sparred today?

吾二人今日之战强者谓谁
My husband.

自是我夫君
You are swayed by the title of wife.

汝身为人妻自当有所包庇