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whose words would inspire tens of students
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to take up pillows and fight,
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most likely to avoid an upcoming test.
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A loving wife and mother who would prove to be
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as skilled at kicking asses as she was at wiping them.
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The dried-up heir to a moist towelette empire,
-
who would prove to be the dried-up heir
-
to a moist towelette empire.
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The sensitive high school quarterback
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who became commander in chief of his own army.
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He would later say of the war, "It was awesome,
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but also, it wasn't."