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Okay, when I was your age,
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my mother used to duct tape
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oven mitts to my hands at night
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to keep me from masturbating.
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Which was such a violation, and it didn't work, by the way,
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And I started to harbor a lot of resentment,
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yet here I am still making excuses for her.
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Why are you telling me this?
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Because I don't believe you
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when you say you'll notify us if your mom contacts you.
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Hey, I empathize. But Taylor, you have to know
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there's a price you pay for covering for an unfit mom: