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Try "Teacher...
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Sex offender, Dagenham."
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Harvard has great classics,
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Yale has great drama,
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Stanford has great weather.
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I just wish they could combine them all
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And make Harper college just for me.
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Ready to go?
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I'm afraid if I hear any more,
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I'm going to gouge her eyes out with this.
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Yeah, let's roll.
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Maybe we can catch the end of the undies.