That's one of the first things my father taught me about finance.

我爸最早教我有关金融的事就是利率
Where... at Embezzle U.?

在哪儿教的诈欺大学吗
Max, I interned at Merrill Lynch.

麦克斯我在美林证券公司实习过
Let me help you with this. It's the least I can do.

让我帮你吧这是我唯一能帮你的地方
I had nowhere to go. You took me in.

我无家可归时是你收留了我
Let me repay my debt to you by helping with your debt

让我帮你想法子还债来报答你吧
to everyone in the world, apparently.

你不是欠着一大屁股债嘛
If you keep talking,

如果你再喋喋不休
I'm going to Merrill lynch myself.

我就去自杀图个清静
I'm one of those people

我是那种
who gets off on untangling big, complicated messes.

享受解决纠结问题的人
And since you won't let me do your hair,

你不让我动你纠结的头发