I'm not gonna be sleeping with him either.

我也不会跟他睡
And when I tell his wife that, I want to look good doing it.

我希望我告诉他老婆这件事时我能美美地说
I have to look 20% better than her.

我得比她好看两成
And since Skype makes you look 20% worse,

而人在视频上会丑个两成
I have to look 40% better than I do now.

所以我得比现在好看四成才行啊
You realize talking about math in a hair salon

你知道在发廊里跟我聊数学
is my worst nightmare, right?

是我最大的恶梦对吧
Welcome to the Tristan Evans salon.

欢迎来到本发廊
Hi, hello. We're here for the... student haircut.

你好我们是来做... 学生剪发的
I'm sorry?

再说一遍
The $6 haircuts for poor people

6块钱的穷人剪发
from the people who don't really know how to cut hair yet.

让也还不是很会剪头发的人剪的那种