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Anchor Rancor.
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Subheader, "Will McAvoy gropes in the New Year."
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What?
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"ACN's newly minted liberal bloviator
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made a scene at a private New Year's Eve party
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at which our spies caught the reengineered lefty firebrand
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making a drunken pass at 'TMI' reporter Nina Howard."
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Whoa, Nelly!
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"But the Tea Party foe got a face full of bubbly
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instead of what he was looking for."
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"McAvoy was wearing a $4,000 custom-made tuxedo
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and a dumb look on his face."