Well, I'm drumming it up by showing off

而我招揽客人的方法就是
This guy's "bid'ness."

用这男人的"巨蟒"揽客
I pretended to be a rough and ready Puerto Rican guy

我假扮成一个波多黎各籍犀利放浪
who still likes to cuddle.

喜欢抱抱的基男
That there's gay chum, my friend.

一钓一个准啊
Ooh, I hooked a big one. Get the net.

你看钓上大鱼了拿好渔网
Hi. Was a muscular Puerto Rican guy just here?

刚才是不是有个威猛的波多黎各哥哥来过
When is there not?

一直都有啊
Would you like to purchase a delicious cupcake while you wait?

你要不要在这等他时顺便买个小蛋糕呢
Well, maybe, while I wait.

反正要等何乐而不为呢
My phone says he's right here.

我手机上显示他人就在这里啊
Here, this is on the house,

给免费请你吃