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Wow, who loved you?
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Eh, I'm guessing she never went to a father/daughter dance
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with her mom's weed dealer.
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You don't know, Max. Maybe he lost his phone
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and he didn't have my number, so he's on his way running here.
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You think he's just gonna rush in soaking wet
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and be like, "Oh, I'm so sorry. The traffic was terrible.
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The waves were bumper-to-bumper."
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This is not a Katherine Heigl movie.
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Sorry, "movie."
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Fine, he's not coming.
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And I'm not getting into the Katie Heigl thing.