Is this something you read

这是你在牙医那里
in "Cosmo" while you were at the dentist?

看《时尚》杂志学到的伎俩吗
Yes.

没错
I said I'd go to the party which doesn't exist

我说我愿意参加一个根本不存在的派对
because you're a lying liar who lies a lot.

因为你就是个彻头彻尾的大骗子
It said the next thing you'd do is deflect.

接下来你就会转移话题
Don't you like having a gal pal that you can hang out with

你难道不想要个既跟你一起玩乐
where there are extra benefits like stock tips?

还能给你股票信息这样好处的女伴吗
- I can't use the stock tips. - Then how about the sex?!

-我又不能用股票信息 -那上床怎么样
- It would take a long time to explain. - Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

-说来话长 -是啊是啊
- Yes. - Yes what?

-想 -想什么
Yes, I love having a gal pal with no commitment and tons of sex.

想我想要个无需承诺又能多多上床的女伴