No, doctor, I'm ill.

不 医生 我病了

That's probably all the crying.

估计是哭太多了

from a guy who calls his ex-girlfriend

隐藏号码去给前女友打电话

Way ahead of you, bro.

我可比你高明多了 大哥

into the inside corner of the eye into the nasal cavity.

经内眼角排入鼻腔

I don't care how common it is. How do you fix it?

我不管是否常见 你说要怎么治

and I will tell everybody

告诉所有人

The answer's no.

还是不行

Maybe it's a table or a lamp.

也许是桌子或者台灯

Well, whatever it was,

不管是什么

Suppose you made it twice as far back,

假设你将地球拉到原来的两倍远

Student: Wouldn't it be r^2?

不是r^2吗